Providing Couples Therapy in Cincinnati
Dr. Butch Losey
I work specifically with couples who:
-are recovering from infidelity,
-are dealing with difficulties in communication,
-find it difficult to talk without arguing
-have problems intimately connecting.
My process couples therapy is systemic, transformational and experiential. My hope is that you will gain a greater understanding of yourself and your partner, which will create transformation in your relationship. I create the session experience so that you will consistently experience each other in a positive, growth-oriented way. You will be encouraged to implement healthy strategies, challenged to stop problematic behaviors and taught skills to be a stronger, better couple.
What to expect?
You will meet with me weekly or every two weeks.
You will be expected to meet on your own as a couple in between office-based sessions to work on specific tasks or to experience each other in specific ways.
You will receive my clinical session note at times to help create focus, reflection or action.
Experiential work in session, experiential work at home.
A kind counselor, an objective counselor, a forthright counselor, a grounded counselor.
Counseling for infidelity
Couples are traumatized when infidelity is discovered or disclosed and the clinician needs to help the couple implement immediate steps to prevent further damage to the relationship. Creating this stability is the first and necessary step to treatment. Once stability is restored, the deeper work of therapy can begin.
Couple's counseling strategies for infidelity are much different than what a traditional counselor would utilize. When couples set up an appointment with me, they will get in quickly, experience a specific treatment approach for infidelity, assessment of the traumatic symptoms (intrusive thoughts, chronic questioning, investigating) and immediate interventions to implement.
Once the crisis is stabilized, infidelity treatment will focus on treating the complex underlying conditions, for example lack of intimacy and intimate communication, problematic boundaries with others outside the relationship, trust, conflict skills, hyper-criticism, and relationship skills.
Receive Guidance On:
*How to disclose facts about the affair
*Dealing with triggering experiences
*What to tell (or not tell) the kids, family
*How to get questions answered
*How to managing intense emotions
Counseling for intimacy
Some couples choose to make intimacy the main focus of treatment. With these couples, treatment is centered on creating change in five dimensions of intimacy. However, when you make change in one or two dimensions, you tend to create change in the others.
1) Couples are encourage to create change in emotional intimacy both in session and out of session. Emotional intimacy describes the intimacy that exists in a relationship where you feel comfortable and safe to share your feelings, without fear of judgment or retribution from the person that you’re sharing with. We will work with communication strategies to do this.
2) Experiential intimacy refers to the bond that people have when they share experiences. I will help you to create "intimate experiencing", which is so much better than "date night".
3) Conflict intimacy results when a couple can continue conversation "in tension". Sometimes just knowing what to do in conflict and having a shared commitment to do it better can make a big difference.
4) Intellectual intimacy results when you feel free to express all of your opinions and ideas. It doesn’t matter if the person you are sharing with agrees or disagrees with you; you feel safe to share your ideas no matter what.
5) Sensual and sexual intimacy describes the intimacy of experiencing each other's body through the sensual experiencing of physical touch and having sex with your partner. I encourage couples to integrate sensual touch in a very specific way AND as a prelude to sexual intercourse. Giving significant time to just be sensual (without being sexual) can increase intimate connection and strengthen sexual intimacy.
communication and conflict
Challenges with communication are a symptom of a deeper problem, so it is not unusual that the vast majority of couples come to therapy saying that they have problems communicating.
Communication that is consistently open, anchored, regulated, intimacy-driven and open to the influence of the other will lead to healing of the deeper issues that exists in relationships. Without healthy communication, couples never get to the heart of relational problems and just replicate the same old arguments.
When I help couples with communication problems, I recognize that putting healthy communication process in place is a vehicle to resolving long-standing hurts and resentments.
In therapy, I will identify elements of healthy communication process and help you experience:
*Communication that is open, characteristic of one partner being curious and the other meeting this curiosity with a willingness to disclose.
*Communication that is anchored on intimately relevant material and explored using specific strategies that increase emotional intimacy.
*Communication that includes circular reciprocity, allowing for one partner to influence, and be influenced by, the other.
*Communication that has shared regulation of emotion, guided by specific principles of engagement for tension-filled topics.
I am a systemic couples counselor, which means that I view the relationship as my client. Systemic therapists recognize that couple's problems are the result of mutually created dynamics and change is best brought about by doing the work within "the system" of the relationship. I am also experiential, which is a process that will help you increase intimate connection with each other.
Get help for managing conflict, increasing effective communication, creating intimacy in your relationship, or recovering from infidelity.
Couples sessions are one hour and fifteen minutes long, which is different that the typical 55 minute session. I believe that I just need the extra time to get the work done in session.
....but intensive sessions are also great for other couples who want significant time with a therapist. This option is my preferred option because intimate contact can develop between the couple that just can't be achieved in a one hour session. Couples can accomplish the work of weeks of therapy in just one intensive session.
Offered on Friday, Saturday and Sunday evenings from 5pm-8pm.
Situated on 142 acres of rolling woodland and farmland with breathtaking vistas of the foothills of the Appalachian Mountains, the Inn offers beautiful cabins, fine dining in the Inn and a private conference room where we can do our work together.
Traditional Couples Therapy Session (1.25 hours long) $200.00
Intensive Couples Session (3-Hours Long) $450.00
Extended Privacy Sessions for Couples (Call to discuss options)
Couples Retreat $3800.00 (Payment Plans Available)
Offering Video Telehealth Sessions for Ohio And Kentucky Residents
My Personal Training Experience
Beyond education and licensure which all therapist have, I believe that the "person of the therapist" is critically important to the outcomes achieved by the couple in therapy. In fact, one of the most important things to know about your therapist is their ongoing training and professional experiences beyond grad school. As you can see below, I take my personal training seriously, developing my "personhood of the therapist". When therapists say they have extensive experience, it is often a vague concept. Below, I outline my significant experience in transformational, experiential, systemic therapy.
Books Written and Educational Background
Author of the book "Managing the Aftermath of Infidelity: A Sequential Guide for Couples and Therapists (2021).
Obtained a Doctorate and Masters degree in counseling (2009, 2004).
Professional Training Experiences:
International Human Learning Resource Network Annual Conference, Los Angeles, California (November 2020). This non-traditional conference is experiential, creating opportunities for personal growth of the clinician. The conference has an international scope and it fosters intimate connections with other professionals from other countries.
Sex, Sexuality and Gender Conference, Harvard Medical School, Boston, Massachusetts (Nov, 2019). Healthy sexuality is essential to the wellness and vibrancy of intimate relationships.
Completed a weekend experiential workshop on Deconstructing Shame: A Gestalt Approach. Cleveland, Ohio (Oct, 2019). Deconstructing our shame response is paramount to creating intimacy, particularly for couples in troubled relationships and those experiencing infidelity. When we lack awareness of our shame, we become less available in our ability to be in relational contact with our partner.
Completed a 6-day intensive training program in the Satir Growth Model of Transformational Systemic Therapy at the University of North Carolina. Chapel Hill, North Carolina (July 2019). This retreat focused on gaining clarity about our own thought processes and feelings, which are crucial elements in improving our communication skills and increasing intimacy with others. It is also important for therapists to know self to engage couples in healthy ways.
Treating Couples Conference, Harvard Medical School, Boston, Massachusetts (Nov, 2018). The focus this year was on using brain science to work with couples, treating traumatized couples and working with couples "that hate each other and the therapist".
Completed a 7-day intensive, residential training program for Satir International Trainers at the Satir Institute of the Pacific, Vancouver, Canada (2018). The retreat focused on effective leadership in training other therapists to use the Satir model.
Treating Couples Conference, Harvard Medical School, Boston, Massachusetts (Dec, 2017).
Completed a 7-day intensive, residential training program in Use of Self in Family Therapy at the Satir Institute of the Pacific, Nanaimo, Vancouver Island, Canada (2017). Beautiful country, beautiful people, beautiful personal experience of self.
Completed an 10-day intensive, residential training program in Transformational Systemic Therapy at the Satir Institute of the Pacific, in Langley, British Columbia, Canada (2017). Fantastic personal and professional experience.
Completed a year-long, post-graduate clinical training in Milan Systemic Marriage and Family Therapy in Cincinnati Ohio (2006). One of the most impactful aspects of my training.
Other Professional Experience:
Counseling Professor at Xavier University (2010 to present).
CEO and owner of Waybridge Counseling (2004-present).
Chair of the Professional Standards Committee for the Ohio Counselor, Social Worker, and Marriage and Family Therapists Board (2018-present).
Appointed by Governor Mike DeWine to the Ohio Counselor, Social Worker and Marriage and Family Therapist Board as a board member and committee member of the Professional Standards Committee for counselors (2020-Present).
Appointed by Governor John Kasich to the Ohio Counselor, Social Worker and Marriage and Family Therapist Board as a board member and committee member of the Professional Standards Committee for counselors (2017-2020).
Executive Director of the Greater Cincinnati Counseling Association for 4 years, President for 1 year and an executive board member for 13 years (2002-2015).
2011 Outstanding Alumnus Award, University of Cincinnati (Doctorate Program), Presented at the 4th Annual Ecological Counseling Conference.
4030 Mt. Carmel Tobasco Road
Cincinnati, Ohio 45255
Couples Crisis Intervention
Couples Intensive Sessions
Couples Communication Skills
Counseling for Affairs
Couples Intimacy Counseling
Sexual Intimacy Counseling
Couples Conflict Counseling
Online Couples Therapy
Online Marriage Counseling